Monday, June 20, 2011

The best of the quote books

Since 9th grade I've been collecting quotes! I have 2 1/2 note books filled with them and it's so much fun to read them because they're like diaries of things people in my life have said. Those who know me well, know the quote books as well and love to look through and see how many times I've quoted them. I thought it'd be fun to make a list of the top 150 quotes so everyone can come here and enjoy them! Here we go:

(By the way, these are listed in chronological order, not greatest to least)

Enjoy :)

1. "Just think, somewhere in Africa right now people are discussing which bug they prefer" ~Janae Christensen

2. "Oven mits are hard to work with, now I know how Barney must feel!" ~Katie Cooper

3. "Randomness is happiness" ~Kestin Larsen

4. "The beard on his chest was as white as the snow.." ~Melinda Porter

5. "You have an evil mind, you should be a teacher!" ~Mr. Thorngren

6. "You can tell it's a comedy cause there's some guy in the background following them with a mop." ~Matthew Taylor
7. "When I was little I didn't want to be a princess, I wanted to be a man cub!" ~Bethany Taylor

8. "I'm moving to Arizona, there's Black people there so I gotta be hip and happening!" ~Kestin Larsen

9. "When we have an earthquake here, Riverdale could be split up into little islands" ~Mr. Ladeau
"Sweet! Then it will be like water world and I'll have gills and be a super mutant super hero!" ~Kaden Okey

10. "We're gonna rip em! We're gonna roll em around! We're gonna LICK THEIR TOES!!" ~Justin Shaw (N.A.L cheer :D)
11. *Ben looks over sour cream poured over his baked potato* "Mom is this paint? Are you trying to kill me?!" ~Ben Taylor (It really was paint!)
12. "Rachel I gave up French to clean old people!" ~Bethany Taylor

13. "Why does everything in this movie have to have feelings?!" ~Mark Taylor

14. "There are 3 types of communication: telephone, telegram, and tell-a-woman." ~Mr. Thorngren

15. *Bailee Tomisin holds up news article in Seminary* "Wild turkies are doing well in Utah..and so will you if you memorize this scripture!"

16. "You can't wear eyebrows! They're gang related! 99.6% of all gang members in America have at least one eye brow! Do you realize what kind of message you're sending out with those things?!" ~Kestin Larsen

17. "Careful Zach, strawberries are aphrodisiacs" ~Grant Newbold

18. "Oh come on Bethany, if people without real legs can run than you can!" ~Rachel Taylor

19. "I'm going for the "I'm wearing these in public" look" ~Kylie Munk

20. "Did you know that your hair and fingernails keep growing after your dead?" ~Shaylee Greer
"Well that explains Cher!" ~Rachel Taylor

21. "Once upon a time, half the world was all total blackness with no sun. The animals were upset about this so they got together for a meeting...I'm still not sure how they managed to do this if they couldn't see anything!" ~Zach Harris

22. "So what do they mean by custom meat?" ~Emily Taylor
"It means you can take in a dead wombat and say, "Hey, make me a burger!" ~Bethany Taylor

23. "I like this show because it's about fat people with a messy house and a bunch of kids." ~Jane Taylor

24. "Why don't they just call it Devil's cake? Of course it's food!" ~Shelly Stringham-weeks

25. "Never fear shadows, they are simply a sign that there is light near by" ~Cora Evans

26. "is it just me.. or is that police car pulling over a car full of Japanese tourists?!" ~Emily Taylor

27. "Mosquitoes were sent here to give us trials" ~Forest Cooper

28. "What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef but it takes a special person to pee soup!" ~Alissa Drummond

29. "If freckles are kisses from the sun then I got raped!" ~Melinda Porter

30. "Someone come bring this cat a glass of water" ~Jane Taylor

31. "I saw a girl today, she was carrying a video camera..it was so hot." ~Ben Taylor

32. "Human meat tastes like beef, only juicier." ~Matthew Taylor
"How do you know that?" ~Bethany Taylor
"From mom!" ~Matthew

33. "Remember "whose" you are" ~Amy Morgan

34. "I'm related to the Pringles guy!" ~Denae Sportsman
"You mean there's actually a guy with a face like that?!" ~Alissa Drummond

35. "We kill millions of germs each day when we wash our hands, we're all murderers!" ~Mark Taylor

36. "I like this place and could willingly waste time in it." ~William Shakespear

37. "Hey what do you think you're doing? This isn't a playground!" ~Father to young son at lagoon

38. "Pollution makes me sneeze." ~Denae Sportsman

39. "Being in your quote book is comparable to winning a Golden Globe!" ~Alissa Drummond

40. It's not superman's fault that he's super strong and you're super not!" ~Melinda Porter

41. *Sign at the Zoo reads: "Not only do these bats not have eyes, but they are completely blind"
"That's like saying not only do you not have legs, but you can't tap dance either!" ~Katie Cooper

42. "Cats can't talk on the phone because their heads are too small." ~Jerry Taylor

43. "Racism is like a delicious piece of cake, if someone wants to know if you have it, you're not going to tell them so!" ~Jeff Green

44. "In all of living have much laughter, life is to be enjoyed not just endured." ~Gordan B. Hinkley

45. "Did we come hungry?" "Yes"
"Are we leaving happy?" "Yes"
"Goal accomplished, let's go!" ~Bethany Taylor at IHOP

46. "My smiley face doesn't have teeth, he eats yogurt and ice cream all day so he's happy!" ~Denae Sportman

47. "Geico should give away free boxes of Cheerios. Then you can lower your cholesterol and save money on car insurance at the same time!" ~Rachel Taylor

48. "Bethany, be in agony more quietly!" ~Jerry Taylor

49. "There are a bunch of old guys sitting in a room somewhere pondering how whales breathe. My uncle is one of them.." ~Jeff Green

50. "I wanted somebody to love me!!" ~Amy Morgan, holding up awkward middle school picture of herself

51. "I hate it when inanimate objects won't cooperate with me!" ~Aimee Smith

52. "When you hug a boy, you may be thinking "Oh, he likes me! He wants to be with me!" but that boy is thinking, "Bow chicka wow wow!!" ~Amy Morgan (giving the morality lesson in Young womens)

53. "If they do it on high school musical 2 it's okay to do with a boy!" ~Amy Morgan

54. "I'm turning into one of those girls I make fun of!" ~Rachel Taylor

55. "I wanna stop peeing Cold Turkey!" ~Bethany Taylor

56. (Discussing egg plant)
"It's a giant purple thing, what's so great about it?" Denae Sportsman
"It's like barney!" ~Melinda Porter
"It's good deep fried and covered in butter." ~Aimee Smith
"So you would eat a deep fried Barney??" ~Rachel Taylor

57. "Rachel you're such a priss.." ~Bethany Taylor
"All I'm bringing is clothes, make up and shoes!" ~Rachel Taylor

58. "You are destined for greatness and it is not a race, others may e great first but you are destined for greatness." ~Amy Morgan

59. "They were like brothers to me, but not like real brothers but more like the way black people say it. I think it's more meaningful that way." ~Zoolander

60. "Eeew erosion, it's everywhere!!" ~Alex Hahn

61. "You're lucky I don't have my pants on right now.." ~Nate Gregory

62. "Rachel throw me your pants, but make sure nothings in them!" ~Jocelyn Haycock

63. "Why does everything revolve around squirrells?" ~Brian Christensen

64. "And the bird will live with us..like a pet dog!" ~Alex Hahn

65. "Look at all those sheep! ..wait those are rocks" ~Carl Morrel

66. "You may have done this a hundered times, but to every scout it is their first time" ~John Anderson

67. "Is that Gary? That white white man over there?" ~Bethany Taylor

68. "That's not a fortune, that's like something a stalker would say!" ~Lain Geest

69. "Get a life!!" ~Emily Taylor, yelling at cemetary

70. "My mom already lectured me about that.." ~Rachel Taylor

71. "..and they had this blind guy..who couldn't sing!" ~Kyle Hokanson

72. "Oh look at you! You're the cutest rat I've ever seen, you're so.. "You retard!!" ~John Anderson (the rat peed on him)

73. "Men, take care not to let women weep, for God counts all their tears." ~Thomas S. Monson

74. "So there we were screaming "If you're happy and you know it" and people started giving us the dirtiest looks. Then we realized it was a funeral!" ~Angie Gessel to Denaue Sportsman

75. "I'd wear the bracelet on this hand but that would be too much "bling" and I wouldn't want people getting the wrong idea" ~Cory Shimata

76. "People are going to come up to you and say, "won't you guide my sleigh tonight?" ~Mom, referring to Mark's zit on his nose

77. "We enhance each others weirdness!" ~Rachel
"We're like magnets!" ~Alex

78. "We need lives" ~Alex
"Yeah we do" ~Rachel
"Where do you buy one?" ~Alex
"I guess you have to make one." ~Rachel
"Where's scout craft when you need them?" ~Alex

79. "I remember there was one girl who asked how you say Gesundheight in German" ~Mrs. Goff
"How do you say it in German?" ~Melinda Porter

80. "Rachel is threatening to tell Austin I had a special dream about him!!" ~Melinda Porter

81. "I barely know the guy and he's asleep in my basement!" ~Breanne Rounds

82. "She said she hadn't had Christmas carolers in 20 years! I just wanted to cry for her!" ~Amber Weston

83. "I don't like walking in the snow because it ruins the beauty of it when there's footprints" ~Matthew Taylor

84. "You could make a fortune off the street with our medicine cabinet!" ~Emily Taylor

85. "You know Rachel, you could have saved up a ton of money y not going on that trip of yours, you could have bought like 3000 spicy McChickens!" ~Mark

86. "I've seen donkies with more passion than this!" ~Bethany Taylor

87. "You see Rachel, buying hardware is like buying a dress." ~Jerry Taylor (my dad)

88. "If we did everything we were capable of, we would surprise even ourselves." ~Thomas Edison

89. "They just kept coming at me! Like I was Poland, and they were Nazis!" ~Loralai Gilmore

90. "Some people are like Mone's, you think they're beautiful till you get up close and see how messed up they are." ~Emily Taylor

91. "True charity is being able to walk through Walmart and come out saying you love the world." ~David Jenkins

92. "Ya know what makes me happy? That crisp first cut into a piece of construction paper." ~Matthew

93. "It's not love it's hormones!!" ~Alex Hahn, to gross couple at Bear Lake

94. "Come home with me little flowers and live up to the measure of your being!" ~Jane Taylor, at Shopko.

95. "This song just makes me want to kiss a boy!!" ~Bryana Lesuma

96. *Gullible scout walks into Matthew's class*
"So my scout master signed me up for the skinny dipping tonight!" ~scout
"Uh..we don't do that here.." ~Matthew
"Those dirty rotton liars!!" ~scout

97. "I should get a wife so I can have someone to sit across from and look googly eyed at." ~Jeremy Bell

98. "Jerry fry up some hamburger for this cat." ~Jane Taylor
"No!" ~Jerry Taylor

99. "Mommy, if Daddy dies will you have to become a lunch lady?" ~My seminary teacher's daughter

100. "It's soo cute!! I about exploded from cuteness!!" ~Haylee Smith

101. "Here's a litst of 40 songs that eery American should know and if you don't know them all, you're a communist pinko and should be taken out and executed!" ~Mr. Garner

102. "Well we have a hole dug, now all we need is a dead cat." ~Jerry Taylor

103. "If there were always butterflies and rainbows, you wouldn't appreciate butterflies and rainbows." ~Amy Morgan

104. "Life is what happens when you are making other plans." ~John Lennon

105. "You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep at night because reality is finally better than your dreams." ~Dr. Seuss

106. "Here Rachel, you can use these as mint sucker things." ~My mom handing me a box of candy canes

107. "Sometimes I wish I could be a penguin. I think it'd be fun, except for that part about sitting on an egg for a month at a time.." ~Brian Stauffer

108. "I'd rather look at horse poop than her to keep my thoughts morally clean!" ~Brennon Flitton

109. "Aren't you working for Dave this summer?" ~Mom, to Emily
"Who's Dave?" ~Emily
"I don't know"

110. "Wow, he's actually pretty hunky now." ~Rachel
"Who?" ~Bethany
"This guy, he was 360 pounds but he lost weight and looks pretty good now." ~Rachel
"Nah, it's just cause he grew a goatee." ~Mark

111. "Kathy, if you were a super hero, your power would be super framing!" ~Bethany (Kathy frames pictures at her job)
"But then all the villains would say, 'I've been framed!" ~Emily

112. "Yeah I got my wisdom teeth out a few months ago. The worst part was that they gave me Lortab and it made me throw up." ~Rachel
'They gave you medicine? All I got was a wooden block to chew on!" ~Derek Theodore (??)

113. "Ben, you wear pants and you live in Utah. Of course you'll get married!!" ~Jane Taylor

114. "I can't believe we're using the good Hannah Montana napkins, it's not even Christmas!" ~Tim Hahn

115. "I'm gonna marry a hot cheerleader who loves God." ~Kenyon (a funny little boy at Club Heights)

116. "Steve Martin never seems to age, he's like a vampire!" ~Ariel Johnson

117. "Now I know what Hell is going to be like. It's gonna be dark and cold and the only source of warmth is a fat lady in a skanky outfit." ~Alex Hahn

118. "And this guy is Jean val Jean." ~Jane Taylor, (telling Elmoine about Les Mis)
"Oh.. I think he lives in my building." ~Elmoine Baliff

119. "My name is Amanda Hansen and I've eaten a hampster." ~Amanda Hansen
"Why?!" ~Bethany Taylor

120. "Geeze Jerry put some clothes on! You're offending your children!" ~Jane Taylor

121. "Brogan, would you pay to see a gorilla beat me up?" ~Curtis Marchent

122. "I hate writing in my journal." ~Madi Dayton
"Then why do you write in it?" ~Amanda Thomas
"Because the prophet freaking said to!" ~Madi

123. "The belt buckles HAVE to be sexy!" ~Jeremy Bell

124. "So there was once this giant orange and it ran over a tree. What did the tree say? "Wow, that's one big orange!" Now this story has been blown way out of proportion. In reality, it was just a regular sized orange running over a piece of broccoli." ~Robin Robinette

125. "I can now hold the puppies at Petsmart without adult supervision!" ~Forrest Cooper on his 18th birthday

126. "I swore I would never use a kybo while I'm here!" ~Lizzay Newman (now Towery)
"I don't even know how to use a kybo." ~Amanda Thomas (now Spackman)

127. "Rachel get your cutie butt down here!" ~Chad Sakurada

128, "I'm kinda nervous for making worlds cause that must involove a lot of chemistry." ~Amanda Thomas Spackman

129. "Is the lake cold?" ~scout, to Rachel
"No, it's really warm." ~Rachel
"Is that cause you're in there everyday?" ~scout

130. "This air has been proven to cure cancer, baldness and Tourette's syndrome!" ~Abe Gunther, giving ou flag ceremony cheer prize

131. "It's like fat camp, only you get paid!" ~Eric Fortney, about Bartlett

132. "Oh my gosh. Look at that man's Rear end!" ~James Gowers (he was referring to the rear end of man's car)

133. "We should name the dog Bella cause her mouth is always open," ~Brian Stauffer

134. "They're great people and I like them a lot but everytime I look at them I think of an Animal planet special on walruses!" ~Layne Morris

135. "You just keep on trying everyday and never give up. It's like Tom Hanks said in Castaway, you never know what the tide's gonna bring in." ~Jane Taylor
"Yeah but Tom Hanks hates Mormons." ~Ben Taylor

136. "Boys get some clothes on, we're going to the Finlinson's!" ~Jerry Taylor

137. "My name's Cory and for the next 4 years, I'm gonna look like a potato!" ~Boy meets world.

138. "Nothing is overpowering. That's what agency means." ~Alex Hahn

139. "Don't let what you don't know, mess with what you do know." ~Kelsee Hart

140. "I fell in love with the way the world is so magical through the lens of a camera. There's something about looking through a camera that makes you stop and realize how special everything really is." ~Zuzanna Audette

141. "You can take one paper of notes into the testing center with you . I feel that you won't even need them because you'll remember everything just by writing it down. So what I would do is write ten pages of notes and then condense those pages into one page. Then take that paper and burn it! Then I want you to write down everything you like about yourself and THAT is the paper I want you to take into the tesing center." ~Bethany's astronomy teacher

142. "Do I have anything on my face?" ~Rachel
"You have beautiful all over your face :)" ~Alex (Aww)

143. "Isn't Honda day in August?" ~Jaden Brophy
"What is Honda day?" ~Brophy family
"The day Honda was invented..? ~Jaden
*Gets up and checks calender*
"See! Civic holiday!!" ~Jaden

144. "I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to make any changes to my ten page paper that I swear I didn't make any changes to." ~Mr. Porter

145. "If it were a Disney movie I'd probably jump up and start singing a song about the gospel!" ~Ashley from my ward

146. *cute old couple enters movie theater*
"Aww" ~Bethany and Rachel
*ten minutes into movie*
"Wanna leave? This movie isn't very good." ~Old man to his wife
*Couple gets up and hobbles out of theater*

147. "We're camping! No one finds each other attractive while camping." ~Whitney Ormsby
"The spirit will make me beautiful!" ~Sydney Garlick

148. "He's willing to catch a grenade, cut himself on a blade and jump in front of a train for her and she doesn't love him!!" "He's stupid!" ~Whitney Ormsbey

149. "Babies are like ferrets, all they do is eat, sleep and poop and you only keep them around because they're cute." ~Alex Hahn

150. "If God wanted me to be a famous opera singer he would have given me talent. If he didn't want me to sing at all he would have made me mute." ~unknown (but so cute!)

I'm thinking that I want to start posting quotes every week but those are my favorites so far :)




120.

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